Sunday, September 11, 2011

Every Day is NOT a Picnic

First, I want to brag on my boy!  This is Cade's second year to play real tackle football.  He is a natural!  He has been built for tackle football from the day he was born!  I can't say football is my favorite sport.  I only know the names of about 4 positions and I find it impossible to watch everything that's happening on the field at once.  Oh well...I am pretty good at keeping my eye on number 12!  Fortunately for me, he is the quarterback...a position I do know :)  Actually, Cade is not only the quarterback, but their lead defender (he plays the entire game!).  When he hands the ball off to someone, he then turns into the lead blocker to make a way for the runner.  It's pretty funny. DSC_7311

Here he is blocking for the kid he just handed the ball off to: DSC_7316 DSC_7321 DSC_7348

Here he is on denfense about to pummel the kid with the ball: DSC_7357 DSC_7383 So...now you've heard about the game on the field. Let me tell you about what was happening in the stands! I have to say...I don't know if I've ever been so frustrated at a 3 year old in my whole life! Part of it is my fault...I went to the game, at noon, in the horrible heat, with 2 three year olds...and actually expected to watch the game and take pictures! What was I possibly thinking??? I have to admit, this is the one area I have struggled the most with both adoptions. What I love most in the world is watching my boys do what they do. Whether it's baseball, sea cadets, swim team, track...whatever...I love to watch them...really watch them.  I think I handled the transition pretty well with Wesleigh.  I had prepared myself that I was going to miss more than I saw.  I wasn't always happy about it, but I knew that was the way it had to be.  Wesleigh made it easier than most in that she stayed put.  So what you think I'm going to say is that I had to chase Gracie around the stands...nope!  It was Wesleigh, not running around but whining and being very ugly.  The worst of it was the 3 trips to the bathrooms with no results (we're at the high school stadium so it wasn't close)...then we'd get back in the stands and she'd act like she was dying because she had to pee.  I already had some sinus stuff going on and didn't sleep well the night before, so it was not fun.  I ended up leaving the game early because I couldn't take it anymore.  The day didn't get better and bedtime couldn't come soon enough!

I say all this to share that life is hard!  It is not always the cute pictures you see on the blog.  It's the homework assignments that barely get done...it's the mom losing her mind because there is another pair of wet panties...it's the brothers running upstairs as fast as they can to escape the insanity below...it's the dad coming home from work exhausted, only to find the house is a wreck and there's no supper...it's hard!

Last night, in my pity party, I went to check on my friend Sonia's blog.  It was like food for the soul.  It is honest and real.  She links a post that touched her...it is definitely worth reading as well.  Bottom line...adoption is amazing, wonderful and the most amazing experience, but it does not come without sacrifice.  I guess I don't know of anything good that doesn't :)

24 comments:

Number 6 and no more counting! said...

aw, you are such a sweetie. You are so right life is about sacrifice. Hang in there.

lea
xo

Julia said...

I read your blog every day, but I don't think I've ever commented. Your post today just really struck me though, and I know a little of what you're going through since my two are very into their sports too and I just LOVE to watch them. They are my favorite pastime :-) When they were smaller I was lucky that I had my mom close to watch whichever one wasn't playing the sport at the time. Maybe, just occasionally, give yourself a break and find a babysitter for the afternoon. Hugs...

Our Family said...

We've been following your blog since you were in China getting Gracie. We are waiting to bring our two 4 year old girls home from China. I worry about the times I will miss with my two boys once we have the girls. Reading peoples blogs I often see the rosy, rewarding side of adoption with adorable smiling pictures. Not usually much of the chaos that I imagine exists. It's good to see the good. Very reassuring in fact that this is doable. But also good to hear some of the frustrations too so I can mentally try and prepare for the not so rosy side of things too. Thanks for sharing!

Our Journey to Grace and Olivia said...

I get this! Oh my gosh this is where I live with 3 boys 10, 14, 16and now a 3 year old and soon to be a 4 year old through adoption. I felt as I read your story you were telling mine. THanks for making me feel not alone!

Teri said...

I so needed this post today. Just got home from church and had one five year old lift my skirt in the middle of church.....and much more. Thank you for letting me know we are not alone.

3 Peanuts said...

Jen,

I love your refreshing honesty. And your bravery to march forward even though you knew last October when you saw adorable Gracie that it was going to be HARD! You don't let hard get in your way which is one thing I love about you.

I was just talking with someone who reads all the adoption blogs and she asked me point blank if it is harder for y'all than it looks (specifically my friends who recently adopted again) because sometimes it all does look too good to be true. I have even thought that sometimes looking at my friends who have gone back even though I have been through it once and I know it is hard (and I talk to y'all in real life!) So thank you for your honest post. I know it will touch many people. We all have our hard days and we need to share those too. It is part of our family stories.

hugs. I pray it get easier for you quickly.

Love,
Kim

Maggie said...

Thanks for your honest post and your link to your friend Sonia's blog. God is with you in all the challenges. Bless you.

Melody Lietzau said...

I LOVED this post. It was like I was reading my life. I could relate so much to every word. Thank you for your pure honesty. I have given my frustration up to the LOrd daily and ask for extra measures of grace and patience but some days it is just plain HARD. Thanks for the link. Blessings Melody

Lori said...

GREAT POST...:):)
I love that you are sharing every part of your families story the good and the difficult moments. It can be rewarding and difficult all at the same time. I love that you get back
Up each morning knowing there can always be a better day. You are a good momma!!! Praying for you sweet friend...:)

Blessings
Lori

Paige said...

Great post! I loved Sonia's post, really spoke to me in how I know how hard this new adoption is going to be and how God has made me so willing....hard though! We must have been on the same page on Saturday as I got so frustrated with Madeline and did NOT handle myself well at all....so sad how fast she hugged my neck when I asked her to forgive me for being ugly:( Oh this parenting is trying but we know God will pull us through, some days its just harder than others.
Praying for you all and hoping tomorrow is better!!
Hugs to you sweet Mommy!

Paige said...

By the way the pics you did get are amazing!!

Hoots Momma said...

I'm there with ya. that's why I think every community needs an adoption ministry. it's not all glitter and bows... it's HARD work and I think that gets lost in the blog world... it did for me. I thought it was just our family that had struggles... thanks again for being transparent. 3 Peanuts did a good job of being transparent too!

sweet momma luv u said...

Love the honesty!! Some times all that people see is the pretty pictures we post or the happy times.

I so struggle with this on a day to day basis with Gabby having Autism. I am not asking for pity but just need some reassurance that it is okay to post about it. I love my kids to death but it is a struggle with all of the change adoption brings to our families.

We are finally going to have an adoption ministry in our area. I am looking forward to the support.

Hang in there Jenn. I know for me if I am not feeling well everything is so much harder!! Hope yu feel better. You are an amazing Mom and have a wonderful family!! Bless you.

Hugs,Jody

Shannon said...

I love your realness Jen! It's hard for me to imagine sweet Wesleigh being "ugly", but I guess even the sweetest of the sweets have a sour day. Hang in there. Praying there are more ups than downs.

Cade looks awesome too! Can you say "football scholarship"? :)

KandK said...

Thanks for keeping "it real". I think sometimes I do get caught up in blogging and all the "cute pic's" and "sweetness. It is very easy to think nobody has has the same problems as me and what am I doing wrong? And I only have 2 kids, I don't know how you do it with 5??? I really appreciate your honesty:)

God Bless,
Diane

Patty said...

Thank you so much for being real. Sometimes I wonder if I'm the only one that misses out on seeing my older boys with their sports. It is hard. But you are right, it's oh so worth it. Having these precious girls home with their forever families.

Kathryn said...

I just love this post ~ thanks for keeping it real! So often I leave blogs feeling like a complete failure! Haha!
I can SO relate to you and your passion for watching your boys and their activities! I have 2 sons 14 and 10 and they both play football, basketball and travel baseball. I LOVE watching them!! My son is a Freshman this year and I don't want to miss a second of his games ~ not so easy with a spicy 2 1/2 year old!! I decided to get a sitter for Sophie for the Friday night game this weekend and a few people didn't recognize me just sitting in the stands watching! It was so awesome and I got to see his touchdown catch!! :) I remember reading somewhere recently "Adoption is not for wimps" ~ so true. Have a great week!

Kelly said...

Sacrifice always reaps a blessing--loved your last statement about all the things adoption! I'm so encouraged by your honesty. It is so easy, especially in Christian circles (and blogs, too) to sugar coat over the hard stuff.

snekcip said...

I can definitely relate to this post. I agree we can get caught up in the cute pictures that we think life is always perfect! Thank you for giving a REAL look inside the NOT SO GOOD days.

Jennifer said...

You know I've told you before, I love your honesty! I know it's not going to be picture perfect all the time after Molly gets here too, but at least I'll know that I'm not the only one going through some crazy times! All so worth it, but so good for adoptive parents to know they're not alone. I loved your friends post, too! Very inspirational!

DiJo said...

Jen,
Thanks for posting this today!!! I loved "After the Airport!" I even made jeff read it!!! You know I can relate to all of this on many levels.. But, I also know that God has called us to this.. The good the bad and the UGH... Thankfully, His grace is sufficient to forgive all of the mistakes I have made!!

You are doing an awesome job with those precious girls!!!!

Love,
Di

Amy said...

I struggled with this too and learned to get a baby sitter...they like it better and I get to pay attention to my "bigs" since the "littles" steal the attention most of the time! Good luck!

elisa said...

This is a great post. Because I know it isn't easy....and yet I have been reading your blog a lot lately, put your video on my blog, showed it to one of my boys....I have so been wanting a sister for our daughter (we too have three bio sons and an adopted daughter). I KNOW it won't be easy to add another, and part of me says leave well enough alone... but the other part longs for one more. My husband (I think) is done. But I still hope...
Thanks for keeping it real, and for the great blog.

Football and Fried Rice said...

You know I love the football pics!!

I have to agree with Amy - hire a sitter! Honestly 3 year old aren't known to be super patient or well behaved :) and you've got 2!! Maybe for some of the games, you can make it a date - just you and Richard. Next year will be a different story, when they are 4! Promise!

I know that sometimes,on the outside is easy to day dream and think it IS all baby dolls and cute dresses - know that we are paying for your family and know it's a hard transition for all - even when things are good. It is still a sacrifice!

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