Friday, July 6, 2007

King Cade


I have been thinking lately about one of the hardest times of my life as a mom. When Cade (my 3rd) was born, he was a sweet, compliant baby. He was, and still is, a clown and kept us laughing all the time. I have so many pictures of him, as a baby, with the cutest wide open mouth smile. I say all this to say, when he turned 18 months he turned into a completely different child. He became "King Cade". He turned into a demanding, fit throwing child that I had no clue how to handle. He embarrassed me so many times, I know I don't remember them all. He would throw the eggs out the cart in Walmart. I can remember bringing them to the library (because that's what the good moms do - right?). He decided to throw a screaming fit right there in line to check out the books. (You never knew when they'd hit, or why) I stood there and made everyone listen because I didn't think it was fair to make the others leave without their books. I can remember having to sit on him to get him in the carseat that day. I turned the car on and stood outside the van trying to gain my composure. I stood there and called a long time friend and told her that I didn't think both Cade and I would survive this stage. She told me that there must be something very special about Cade to make him so different from the others. She told me to hang in there because there was a light at the end of the tunnel, and I would soon see what is so special about Cade, and what makes him different. Soon after that, I realized what one of my problems was with Cade: we were exactly alike. Both stubborn as all get out and everything had to be our way, or else. My other two evidently were willing to let me have my way. Not Cade. I began to give him more control in the things that weren't a big deal: getting in and out of his car seat by himself, climbing in and out of the stroller, etc, etc. I let him feel like he had some control on those things, and then on the important things (like holding my hand in the street) stood my ground, and he didn't seem as obstinate.

At about 2 1/2, Cade completely changed back to the child he was before. It wasn't overnight, but I started noticing that I could actually bring him places without a fit occurring. My attitude to parenting completely changed during this year. I became much less judgemental toward other mothers. Before Cade, I just thought I was that good of a mother. "My child would NEVER do that" Well, after Cade, I learned that there are times when a stubborn child will do whatever he wants, whether it embarrasses you or not. I know that God taught me a very valuable lesson through this experience. I just really pray that I learned everything I was supposed to, and doesn't feel the need to make me do it again with Chinababy!!

The top picture is a true example of what Cade looked like during this trying year. This was at one of the boys baseball game. It is not a true representation of what I looked like during this year. This picture makes me look way too calm!

The bottom picture shows the other side of Cade even during this time. One day I will do a post on Cade as he is now. He is the funniest, cutest kid I know. He brings so much joy to our lives and family.

Notice the hat, he only took this hat off to take a bath and to sleep. It sat by his bed when he slept and was back on his head first thing. Too cute!!

5 comments:

Life With All Boys said...

Every child is so different and we have to learn how to parent them differently. It's a hard learning process sometimes. I always try to remind myself, "pick your battles."

Life With All Boys said...

p.s. Oh how I'm praying that first picture is NOT me and Carter at the Little League field next year!!

Robin

MawMaw said...

How well I remember that stage! Talk about a transformation. Cade is indeed special - God must have a special purpose for him! He sure is loads of fun for grandparents!

MawMaw said...
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